|
|
|
 .jpg)  Our Lil Princess: Amabel Loh Birthday: 21 August 2006 Place of Birth: Thomson Medical Centre, Singapore Delivery Method: Natural Delivery without Epidural Borned in Gestation age: 38weeks 3days Weight at Birth: 3.005kg Length at Birth: 47cm Breastfeed: 14 months  Our 2nd Lil Princess: Aisleyne Loh Birthday: 15 August 2008 Place of Birth: Thomson Medical Centre, Singapore Delivery Method: Natural Delivery without Epidural Borned in Gestation age: 39weeks 2days Weight at Birth: 3.010kg Length at Birth: 48cm Breastfeed: 3 years+  |
ADVERTISEMENTS
title:
date: Wednesday, December 03, 2008 time : 5:19 PM I am in extremely foul mood now! I am complaining again. I have not been a good mommy; have been getting more and more impatient over the 2 little ones. I am out of control over myself; getting more and more violent over things and peeved over small thing. Stress and tiredness is the culprit but the main master is my husband. I believe if my husband more willing to offer help throughout, the stress level will definitely minimize and I won’t feel so tired too. Every time while expressing milk in the feeding room, I dozed off a few times in 20 minutes. Can you imagine how tired I am, I could feel my head so heavy, and chest is burning. I really don’t mind scarifies my sleep for my children; if I am a widow/single mother with no husband to help to clean/bathe my children, feed them, put them to sleep etc. But I got a husband leh yet he seem to be useless to me, can’t help to minimize my stress yet rubbing on it. He’s at home or not really makes no difference. I rather he go work. Maid had a lot of work to do yet husband is craze over facebook now, he forever glued to the online games or forum. He can only provided very limited help. Outside he is still ok but once reach home nothing is more important than logon to play games. I am so busy with the little one and ask him do a small thing like changing the room’s water everyday for me, in the end also never change. And I still got to do it in the end if not dream of those scary things asking for water again. How to depend on him to do things? I still trying to learn to heck care it; 要死一起死。 Do thing always do half way. Need his help to bathe Amabel also need to pester very long. Lot of excuses from him. Keeps saying wait wait wait. Wait for the WWIII huh!! After I keep forcing him to help me bathe for Amabel, then he will lift his bum up. I believe while he bathing Amabel, his mind is still all on those facebook’s wall message, facebook’s pet and games. Hence, always after bathing her, he will faster pass her to the maid (she is still busy with the housework) and ask the maid to change her instead and he faster glue to the laptop again. Just like today, also won’t 自动 a bit to chauffer Amabel to school and me to work since is his off day and he had already waked up. Everyday morning is super busy and rushing for me. Wake up got to re-sterilize the pumps, pump milk, make milk for Amabel, change Amabel’ diaper and clothes, brush her teeth, pack my breast pump barang barang to work. Is his off day and already woke up yet never help a single bit so I won’t feel so rush but instead he logon the laptop again surfing net and play games and seeing his wife carrying 4 big bags and going to send Amabel to school and then work and the wife is already late for work leh. Hai…. Chim sim already. I always feel super exhausted like anytime I will faint. I can tell you, since Aisleyne is born. He never offer to carry her more than 10 times, his excuse -> Amabel will jealous. Boo~ He never talks much to Aisleyne too. Reach home the first thing is on the laptop and login to facebook, games or forums. I always told him, I wondering Aisleyne knows who is this guy is or not. Argh… a lot more to complain but came to think about it… No point lah. But I always get so work out whenever i think of it or see him concentrate playing games and surfing net I am still thinking whether to seek help from Psychotherapist. I really need pretty soon. Anyone got good and cheap one to recommend?? Write too fast, don't know what I am writing also. Argh.... Labels: My views 6 Comments:
|
6 Comment(s):
do you think it may be a good idea to sit your husband down to have a chat?
it sounds like the both of you need to discuss this issue seriously. your daughters (both) are also his children and he must put in his share of work. you are obviously over-worked and he must be able to see this.
i'm afraid the more you leave the problem and learn to 'heck care', the more you will not get anything from him.
it might sound bad, but one of the reason why he is behaving like this because you are in a way allowing him to do so by not insisting he should do his fair share for the kids.
i am not critising you, and i do feel sad for you.
please have a word with him. this is serious.
if you let this go and carry on allowing him to behave is such a way, you have no reason to complain in the future.
hey e-ling,
really admire ur strength and dedication towards ur family.hang in there, okie.
for counselling, u can check this link out to make appt:
http://www.counsel.org.sg/appt.htm
i would recommend, juliana toh or anthony yeo.
they were my lecturers when i was doing my counselling diploma. Both are good with marital counselling.
take care!
*hugz* men are like that la.. insensitive most of the time.
My hb till now have never bathed bernice, changed her diaper ONCE only !!!
You are definitely a good mommy, a SUPER FANTASTIC one! I hear you on your problem and I want to tell you that you are not alone okay? I also cannot fathom why those online games are so important than the wife and kids. Are they obsessed or what? Isn’t spending time with the family and watching the child reaches their milestones more gratifying than winning a game? If you won or lost a game, you wake up the next day being the same person, same man. It’s just a game. But if you lost your loved ones (choy! Touchwood!), you will NEVER be able to have them back just like before. You can’t turn back time!
It is perfectly fine to play games, spend time with your friends, we know you need some ME-time too. But don’t get too overwhelmed that you neglect your family and loved ones. ELing is not asking you to help her ALL THE TIME, she just want to see some INITIATIVES from you. I am sure you can see how tired and frail she looks now..dont you feel heartpain as her husband? Even people who don’t know her at all can feel the ache! If such situation were to happen to another woman, she would have probably run away with another man and heck care about the family.
But ELing is not such a person. Even though she always complain about you but we all know that she still love you and not giving up on you. When anonymous passed some negative remarks about you, she still side with you. I know you are a nice daddy and love your wife and kids but you need to do more to help your wife who is clearly very worn out! No offence intended and please don’t take this personal.
hey super mummy... you are definitely not alone with this... men are like that :(
you might want to talk to ur husband and let him know how much u need him... or just keep his laptop batt/charger away till he finish his bonding time with his 2 girls. :P
You have done a super good job as a mummy.. keep it up. do find time and rest. take care of yourself
Collie,
thanks! no point sitting down have a chat with him. Not the first time I complaining and blog about this and he has been seeing my blog. He always defend himself, alot of reasons and in the end I am always the one in wrong. So no points in the end will got me even more angry again.
cheekz,
thanks for the link. Will surely look them up if I really need it one day. Oh didnt aware u are doing counselling diploma. hehe
dardar and Yvonne,
I do agreed that most men are like that. But I do see some Daddy really do their part as a husband and initiative in taking care their kids but why cant he be like them.
Dardar,
Then my hb worst than ur hb. He didnt bathe or change Aisleyne diaper once! But still not that bad that he bathe Amabel when I keep pestering him to when I busy with the #2
Anonymous,
I AGREED what you said. Dont know what so fun about the games. Ok to play games but not stick to the games more than 20% of the times mah