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 .jpg)  Our Lil Princess: Amabel Loh Birthday: 21 August 2006 Place of Birth: Thomson Medical Centre, Singapore Delivery Method: Natural Delivery without Epidural Borned in Gestation age: 38weeks 3days Weight at Birth: 3.005kg Length at Birth: 47cm Breastfeed: 14 months  Our 2nd Lil Princess: Aisleyne Loh Birthday: 15 August 2008 Place of Birth: Thomson Medical Centre, Singapore Delivery Method: Natural Delivery without Epidural Borned in Gestation age: 39weeks 2days Weight at Birth: 3.010kg Length at Birth: 48cm Breastfeed: 3 years+  |
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date: Saturday, September 20, 2008 time : 7:47 PM I AM BLOODY HOT NOW Came back from GWC afew hours, but I am still boiling hot now about that woman and Amabel. I thought my temper become better? Nope I think now become worst. And this Amabel keep activate it. Bring her out never be a joy anymore, she is so hyperactive + emotional. I really don't how to handle her temper tantrum. Out of the sudden she will start screaming. If we stop her from doing anything, she will start screaming and crying. But sometime we got really no choice but to stop her from doing dangerous acts. I tried all methods on how to handle temper tantrum kid but no use. Bren said just let her scream and ignore her so she knows she cannot threaten me with that and if she hit my max threshold, just walk away. So I won't get agitated and make the situation worst. but how to ignore her and walk away when is outside? All peoples will start looking at us. Looking at how badly Amabel behaves and how she screams. What wrong with toddler keep screaming and crying? Not we force her to scream or make her cry. We couldn't control it also right. I tried to pacify her but she just keep crying and screaming, what you expect me to do, cover her mouth and stop her from screaming?? Lock her in the house and don't bring her out?? I was really sad over it. First is at the foodcourt, she screams and whole foodcourt peoples looking at us like monkeys Then next more exciting show is at the Accesseries shop, I went there want to get a hair clip. And Amabel throwing tantrum and start screaming real loud and crying. Me and my helper tried pacify and distract her, but she just didn't stop. Helper want to carry her out of the shop and she still keep crying and screaming Twisting her body, stomping her feet. I am already super frustrated and I saw this 30's woman , staring at us and DIAO us, showing how irritating we are.. I start to become SUPER HOT. I force open my eyes super BIG and fiercely stared back at her. She still give a attitude face. I SHOUT at her "LAO CHARBO, SIAO CHARBO showing irritating face for what?" I don't why just this words came across my mind. She just stand there like nothing happened. I were so angry that I dragged Amabel out of the shop after that and Amabel is still crying and screaming like hell. And I feel that I am more like a crazy woman. Not because I am carrying Aisleyne on hands and Amabel ia there. I think I will lose my mind and BEAT that woman up. I believe her this pattern, surely one day get beaten up by someone else Damn it. Hate people giving me attitude. Showing people attitude, please look at who the person is first Damn it. Came to think about it, really feeling bad that I might have frightened my baby Aisleyne and Amabel. I got to really control my temper and try to be more patience over kids. He is out to play MJ again. He said that time is the last time he will play. And now again and he chose a very bad day I have to play MJ. Trying to bribe me with a pizza (cos yesterday I said I want to eat and he don't want to order for me) for dinner now I know why. Everyday come back from work, the first thing is to on the laptop play game and surf net, didn't even take a look at Aisleyne first. This is the period of time where i need him the most, but he is not here to help. Need me to force him rather than taking the initiative instead He sure get those nasty thing from me. Admit it and don't backup with reasons and flood my blog with stupid comments again Never ever make me love him more. @_ @ 7 Comments:
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7 Comment(s):
omg. i think amabel's temper is just like yours. just tt at this age, she's not able to present or verbalise like an adult.
so pls try to be a gd model to her. so what if tt lady is staring, she hasnt hurt u or ur children in any way, just let it go and not shout at her or even thinking of beating her up.
maybe she has no children so she doesnt understand? maybe she really has a nasty attitude but it made u've a nasty attitude too. it's not worth it.
when u cool down and think abt it, it's just a trival matter. only when u chg then u'll see the chg in amabel.
Yah think Amabel inherited my temper, perhaps during pregnany I keep having temper. ha!
But no lah I know this is a stage all the toddler will go through.
I alway try to show good model to her. But yesterday just couldn't tahan and met this nasty woman make me become worst. Think if someone else, that person will also like me want to give her a big scold to wake her up. Her that expression, pointing, actions, not many people see liao can tahan.
I know is not worth it came to think about it, really feel regret to show this reaction infront of amabel. I told myself shall try to control my temper.
actually when dealing w this kind of situation, it's best to pretend as if nothing has happened so tt she knows u're not affected by her irritating behaviour.
if u oso worked up, she knows she has won by irritating u.
so.... gd luck!
A good thing that u scold her back.. These old cha bor deserve it... Obi good... When u see ur kid/baby cry, u will feel very pek chek one.. That time Jaerio cry so jialet, i also become moodless and even the LJS staff knock on me with my water spill on his clothes, i din say a sorry but stared at him instead...
To anon... I dun think by scolding her make myself terrible.. instead, i feel that she should be xinku when i scold her...
I hate to say this but that lao char bo certainly deserves some daggers pierced into her eyes! *evil laughs*
I think for non-mommies, they cannot fathom the kind of distraught situations that we face. The first time that I brought bbJ out for shopping, he wailed out loud (colic attack..sigh) in a restaurant and I got so many stares and someone (a lady voice) even commented “aiyo”. perhaps she doesn’t mean anything but the first thing that flashed across my mind was “I am a bad mommy!”…Morale dropped big time… : ( but again, on hindsight, I shouldn’t feel that coz she may not mean anything at all but seriously, if you don’t have good comment or advice or help then just shut up lah. ;p
Sz, you are definitely not a bad mommy, dont ever think that way. Cause at that point of time, we feel loss, what to do to stop them from crying and worrying that it is disturbing others.
For your case maybe that lady really doesnt mean anything cause her "aiyo" maybe mean aiyo why the little boy cry until like that or "aiyo the parent must be stressful when baby cry non stop"
but for my case, that char bo give us a "hate us to cock look", definitely feel that we are disturbing the ppls like we purposely one. Damn! How not to blow up right.
Hey, u ok or not? Your posts all sound quite negative. Hope all's better now for you..
Anyway I just want to highlight to you that I didn't mean to ask you to walk away from her but I did suggest that you ignore her screams and don't fuss over it. Take it that it doesn't matter to you. I believe Bel is also going through a very rough patch of her life, sharing your attention with her younger sis, changed of maid and such..
I actually have the same problem so by right I shouldn't be advising you but I do know what I'm supposed to do and I like to share that with you.
First, you must try to control your anger. I know it's near impossible but if you want the situation to be controlled, persevere. If at home just before you burst, go out of the house or far far away from Bel. So long you no longer hear her scream. After you've cooled down, return with a very firm face and if she has already stopped screaming, sit down with her on your lap. Look at her in her eyes and tell her that what she did isn't right. Tell her what you prefer to do like talk instead of scream. And keep doing reaffirmations with her, especially when her mood is good. Such as, 'Bel, you're mummy's good girl. You listen to mummy well. You always behave. You are a sweet girl. You always make mummy happy' Use positive affirmations, drop the 'Nos' and 'Cannots'.
When outside, if a similar situation happens again like what you said in your post here, try bringing her away from the situation. DO NOT coax her there. Especially in front of other people. Have a quiet time with her then talk to her and ask her why she did that. Tell her what you prefer her to do.
This is not exactly bribery but it usually works. Give her something to look forward to. Tell her after you buy this or that and on your way home, she'll get 30 minutes of playground play or stroking the cat at your void deck. It works with Arianne and I urge you to try.
Tell her you'll buy her a nice cup of juice if she can wait till you finish buying your hair clip.
Just don't wrestle with her there.
And if J can have his MJ times, you can also have your manicure/pedicure time. Go buy a package, fix a day of each week and book yourself with yoga sessions. Trust me, your life will be happier, health pinkier and your patience will grow.
I went through quite rough patches when A was a few months old. I was so convinced that I should see a psychiatrist for meds. But somehow my own affirmations worked me up and now, I feel better and people around me is also seeing improvement in my terrible character.
Your girls are looking at you all the time as their guardian. And I know you can be quite a stubborn fellow :, so I'm sure if you remember my words, you will be determined to do it. Good luck my dear.. Inhale, exhale and BIG smile :)